Hurricane Florence Ironman
“Every adversity, every failure, every heartache carries with it the seed of an equal or greater benefit”
Sometimes Life Throws Too Much
and it’s not necessarily a bad thing when it does.
In early recovery (where I still am) I have I struggled with putting too much on my platter. Particularly putting too much on my platter too quickly. Learning how to parse responsibilities and needs from “the wants” is one thing that helped me from putting too much on the platter. This insight was a necessity because when I have a bunch of wants on my list I start to get very frustrated when I don’t get around to them. However, by limiting the wants and following my system of priorities, I have found freedom from this struggle.
I do this by following very careful and simple instructions. Namely, it follows three tiers. If the thing is for me alone, and not directly necessary to my health, I can most likely toss it- or keep it pretty far down the list, resting at tier 3. If it is something that can help other people then that thing moves to tier 2. Finally, if it helps my family then it moves to tier 1. Most recently, I have put a number of things on my platter. Blogging, helping non-profits, triathlon training, being a land lord, attempting to talk and visit my son more often, being a more attentive husband, driving Uber, consistently attending recovery meetings, yoga, keeping the house clean, looking for new places to live, looking for new jobs- well you get my point. The list can go on and on.
Although most of these fall under tier 1 or tier 2, they still require attention each day. Recently, a few of these have began to clash creating a difficult spot. The only recipe I know to follow for tier 1 items when they crash is to deal with the one that is beginning to crash. Similarly, with items from tier 2. It seems that I don’t have many items from tier 3, otherwise I could dump them or put them on the back burner. Therefore, the problem has been slightly different than separating away “the wants” to create more room for responsibilities. Therefore, as one has begun to crash I have found relief through acceptance. For instance, a hurricane has destroyed Wilmington, NC so the Ironman I have been training for may or may not happen in three weeks. By accepting this I found a place of peace in my training. Because there are variables I can not control I am able to place training on a sub station in tier 2, lets call it maintenance station. In the maintenance station, I can look at every part and piece involved, rather than just powering through. When I did this I realized that if I was to participate in this race I would be going against the purpose of my training all together. I did not start this training to complete an ironman, I started this training to help others by using my training to raise money for non-profits. When I looked at it in the maintenance station I became able to refocus. So I decided instead of participating I was going to be available to the community of Wilmington in a time of need whether the race is canceled or not.
Putting my focus back on helping others gave me peace and helped me navigate my priorities.
It wasn’t the training that began to be too much, it was my self involvement. My item in tier 2 began to be too much about myself. Because I had spend countless hours working my ass off for the race I was devastated to think of the race not occurring. This zapped my energy! Once I reorganized my thoughts and took myself out of the equation I realized it was preposterous to be mad at a hurricane for ruining my chance of racing while people are struggling with the grips of life. I needed to make myself available to the people of Wilmington! Suddenly a surge of peace came over me and I stopped worrying about wether the race was going to happen or not. When the worry was eliminated from this item, the other items did not seem hard to attend to. I felt I was able to navigate through my system of priorities. And what an opportunity- rather than being filled with fear I am filled with gratitude that I have the strength and energy to help those in need!