About Mark

Basic History

Mark is originally from Atlanta, Georgia and was raised by two loving parents, Ben and Cheral. He enjoys being the youngest of four siblings.

In 2003 Mark moved to Montana to finish high school at his first rehabilitation program due to having troubles in school and social life in Atlanta. Upon graduation he moved back south to study Psychology at Lee University in 2006. Mark transferred back out to the big sky state in 2008 and graduated from the University of Montana with a degree in Psychology in 2011.

Following college, Mark pursued a research oriented life in Missoula, Montana while he chased his dream to obtain his Ph.D in Psychology. A heroin addiction caught Mark in his footsteps and this thwarted his ability to continue towards the Ph.D. When he was blessed with his first son he moved from Missoula to distance himself from his opiate and party lifestyle. Mark remained on suboxone opiate maintenance therapy for a year until he began struggling with prescription anxiety medications and alcohol.

The years following 2013 Mark has been struggling to battle his alcohol and pill addiction. In 2016, Mark relapsed with opiates while on anxiety medications and alcohol and eventually had a near death experience. After this, Mark checked himself into an intensive inpatient rehab in Minnesota, where he found relief from opiate addiction once again.

Mark joined a sober living community in Loveland, Colorado, but refused to work on areas of his life that caused difficulties. When he had an HIV scare he began using medical marijuana and within two weeks began using anxiety medications again. He was asked to leave the sober living community so he moved back to Whitefish, Montana.

In Whitefish, Montana Mark has enjoyed being a raft guide, a mental health counselor, an outdoor enthusiasts in skiing, biking and hiking; while suffering from extreme alcoholism. In 2017, Mark had a severe concussion while skiing. Because he could not remember events or make clear sentences he decided to drink his brain to destruction and join disability. Instead, his cousin came out on a random trip and invited him to an AA meeting. During this, Mark realized it may be possible to change.

Since April of 2017 Mark has worked hard on recovery and it has paid off. He has now competed in triathlons and continues his journey in sport and endurance.

He now works as a sober health, fitness, and wellness consultant to high profile clients. His first book, My Suicide Race recieved tremendous praise and earned multiple badges by Amazon as a #1 best selling book.

What is this blog about?

The purpose of this blog has always been to help others in a way that comes natural to me, through writing. Over the course of writing this, however, a lot more has happened that I never foresaw.

First, I never thought I’d actually become a triathlete because I didn’t even think I’d ever be able to do something like a triathlon and I thought people who do triathlon were crazy. Well, maybe one of those still stands, but I now know that I can do something like triathlon if I follow simple steps, ask for help, and trust that good things can happen.

I also never thought I’d come out of the closet, but triathlon, as you will read through the blog, helped me to learn to accept myself. Furthermore, I didn’t know that this would all change a few years later and sexuality would start feeling like a non-issue.

What has trials to triathlon become now?

So much more has happened above and beyond coming out of the closet and getting sober that I felt it was time for this blog to go on. Triathlon continues to bring me out of my trials and I continue to want to share how, but I don’t really have an outlet, so this is just that, a place for me to share.

Nov 17, 2020

Coming Out and Relationships with My Sons

Coming out as gay has turned out to be the most beneficial thing I could have done with my sons. I was so scared it was going to hurt them. But, turns out our relationships have become closer and more authentic and more satisfying.

Sep 12, 2020

Married, Coming out, Divorce: It Hurts

Coming out while married is a very hard thing. This is the type of thing that we can prevent by having a more open and accepting world. Even if you don't believe in gay-marriage I'm sure you believe in alleviating the type of pain I caused by forcing myself to believe I was straight. We can do this with kindness and openness.

Aug 15, 2020

Under Pressure: What it's like coming out after 30 years

Coming out as gay at 33 is hard. When most kids were finding out who they were in high school, I was busy hiding who I was. Now, I’m working on developing that person with the added pressures of being an adult and sometimes it just feels like too much. In this article, I talk about how I’ve learned to cope. Sober, in peace, and effectively.

Aug 14, 2020

Inspect Belief Patterns, Not Laws: moving past LGBTQ discrimination

We can make as many laws as we want to protect a race, a sex, a religion, or sexual identity but until we make a change in belief patterns the laws will have little effect. For LGBTQ discrimination, I notice through my own homophobia, that I need to begin seeing this community as a positive. When this happens, I more fully accept the gay in me and the gay in my brother or sister. Try it and see if it works for yourself too.

Aug 7, 2020

Speedo Awakening: A release from shame

Shame over my body started when I was a child. I thought that because I liked boys that I should have been born a girl. But a speedo in my 30's allowed me to recognize the man I was and the body I now loved and cherished.

Jul 24, 2020

Body Shame

Body Shaming happens we make someone feel ugly, gross, and unworthy because of their body type and I've experienced it in every phase of my development. When someone asked me how I built confidence in my body, I was instantly drawn to question my own confidence and face my own shame.

Jul 17, 2020

I Owe Apologies

I didn't think this blog would lead to me coming out as gay, but it did and when it did, I didn't think there was much left to share, but there is. There is more to share now than ever and for me it's more important than ever to share it all. The good, the bad and the ugly. Here’s to a new journey!

Feb 11, 2020

What Coming Out as Gay Does Not Mean: The Final Post

The final fear I had to face in the trials to triathlon story is revealed in this post. It is finally time to accept fully who I am, regardless of the consequences and step out with pride and confidence. I’m gay.

But, what does this all mean? What is going to change? What is next?

Oct 13, 2019

The Truth Behind The Smile

My psychological make up has made me particularly sensitive to the horrible things I have learned to call myself. May these thoughts arise from others, social-stigma's or diagnosis, they don't have to have power over me any more. But sometimes they do and when they do, I get to grow.